Jillellamudi Memoirs - 23

As I placed the pictures of Mother, Sri Ramakrishna, Ma Sarada Devi and Swami Vivekananda in the puja room and turned around, I was astonished to find brother R standing in the hallway. It left me speechless for a moment!


Brother R is the son of Mother of Jillellamudi. After working in the banking sector for many years, he is now retired and currently residing in Bapatla. We neither knew that he was in Jillellamudi at that time nor were we expecting him. We hadn’t even invited anyone in Jillellamudi as we wanted to keep the event simple. Though we wished to, we gave up on the idea of inviting sister V, because the elevator work wasn’t complete and without it she wouldn’t be able to climb up to the second floor.


Among Mother’s children, after the passing away of the other offsprings, only brother R, sister Hyma and brother Subba Rao survived. Of them, sister Hyma passed away at a very young age in 1966 and brother Subba Rao, much later in his old age. Presently, brother R is the only one left for us to see. He bears an uncanny resemblance to his Mother. His arrival was like Mother herself gracing us with her presence.


Immediately, I touched his feet and welcomed him and urged everyone to do the same. I then requested him to offer flowers to Mother’s picture after which we followed suit offering flowers to Mother and Sri Ramakrishna. Cow milk was ready and there began the preparations for making milk porridge.


With the intention of releasing our next print book ‘Jabala Darshana Upanishad’ in Mother’s presence at Jillellamudi, we brought a few copies of the English and Telugu books along with us. Upon seeing brother R, we had the books released by him and felt as happy as Mother releasing the books with her own hands.


While the porridge was being prepared, we gathered in the hall, where we had him seated in a chair and the rest of us settled around him on the floor. We sat there simply gazing at his face for sometime while he too sat looking at us smilingly without saying a word. Seeing him felt as if I were seeing Mother and it appeared as though she herself had come here in brother’s form. As he sat there, we could see some change come upon his face and transform into Mother’s smiling face. At once the atmosphere in the room began to undergo some unknown change and the room became completely charged as if a current of electricity were passing in the air.


I began to effortlessly slip into a meditative state. Mind became calm without even trying and it began turning inwards. Tears started rolling down my eyes, without my knowing. Brother was silently observing all this and he too closed his eyes for sometime. People who sat around us were silently watching all of this.


After remaining like that for about 10 mins, the tide of emotions began to subside. I slowly opened my eyes, brother too opened his eyes and looked at me with a smile.


“I have seen many such incidents since my childhood. Many who came to visit Mother would cry inconsolably. Seeing such incidents in my childhood, I used to wonder if crying was a mandate here and that everyone should cry in such a way,” he said smiling.


We all listened quietly.


“What is your intention behind buying this house? What actually is your path?” he asked.

“Ours is the path of meditation. Our aspiration is to have an ashram, for people wanting to walk in my path. Staying here and doing sadhana peacefully is our goal. Though I primarily am a devotee of Sri Ramakrishna, my path is completely different from that of Ramakrishna mission. We do not get ourselves involved in social service, but we silently help others as per our capacity. The present situation in India does not demand service. We wished to have a house for ourselves here, wherein we can do sadhana silently. We bought this house so that we could come here every now and then, stay for a few days and do penance,” I replied.


As though recollecting past memories, brother remained silent for sometime.


He then continued, “Prior to the year 1950, Mother used to live in a small hut in this very place where you now see the Shiva temple. And between 1960 and 1970, she used to live in another hut where, today, the akhanda nama japa takes place. Later on she moved to the current building. Around 1950, a person named Kotamraju Narayana Rao came looking for Mother. He had some sort of an internal experience. He said to Mother, ‘You are hiding in such a remote place. Everyone needs to know about you. I shall write an article about you in the newspaper.’


To that, Mother responded on these lines, ‘By reading whose article have you come here, my child? The power that brought you here will bring them too. Why do you worry? You simply think about yourself.’ She never gave any importance to publicity. During that period, she also mentioned one more thing, ‘In future, this place will become a home for austere practices. Many yogis and sadhakas will come and reside here.’ I feel that your coming here might be an indication for it,” he added.


“None of us present here today, were born in 1950, when Mother spoke these words,” I said.


“Mother’s vision would go beyond many lifetimes. Let me tell you another such incident. At about the same time, Mother told an aged person who came to visit her, ‘I have seen you earlier, my son.’


‘Where did you see me, Mother?’ asked he.


To which she replied, ‘I saw you serving food at Mangalagiri Choultry in such and such a year.’


It was true that he had been to Mangalagiri Choultry that year, but Mother was not even born at that time. She would thus talk even about the incidents that occurred well before her birth as though she had witnessed them,” said brother.


“Maybe we have seen Mother in our past births which is probably why we came here again in this birth?” said I.


Brother nodded his head, as if in agreement.


Meanwhile, the porridge was ready and after offering it to Mother, each of us partook a little of it. Then taking leave, brother got up and headed downstairs.


I looked at everyone and their faces were beaming with excitement, as if they had been witnessing a miracle until then. As brother was narrating the incidents from some 70 years ago, many felt as if they had traveled back in time to that era.


We all felt as though Mother herself had come in the form of brother and blessed us.



All rights reserved. This article has been translated by Annapoorna B, which was originally posted in teluguyogi.net on October 19, 2018. The content or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express permission of the publisher.


501(c)3 organization - Tax ID # 81-3322880